Let's face it - even the best marriages have areas for improvement. Our marriage is pretty great but there are definitely things we need to work on.
We would probably both agree that the area we struggle with the most is making time for just the two of us. Whether it's a date night on a semi-regular basis or a weekend away, we always have a million and one reasons why they don't happen.
It's not that we don't like spending quality time alone together; it's just such an ordeal to coordinate schedules. One would think we had it made with built-in baby sitters since we have the two bigs (who can basically fend for themselves) and then Princess Mia. But the problem is the two bigs have much more active social lives than we do. Coordinating everyone's schedule to find a night that no one has 'organized' activities (games, meetings, rehearsals, etc.), Tim is in town, and the bigs have an open social calendar is like trying to negotiate an international trade agreement. It's so mentally exhausting we've kind of just given up trying (unless you take into consideration our random late night strolls through Target).
This is why I was quite shocked when Tim came to me back in the spring and said we were going on our church’s annual fall marriage retreat in October. This was very out of character for him - he's an engineer who likes to have a plan and know all the details before he commits to anything. Well there was no way back then that we would know what everyone's schedule would be now, and that’s probably a good thing.
Tomorrow morning we’ll leave behind a weekend packed with football and soccer games, SATs, and I’m sure lots of other things that I’m forgetting (but have written down for the grandparents who are graciously coming into town to temporarily manage the house) and head to the mountains for two and a half days of ‘just us’ time.
I pray we return refreshed and committed to making regular quality time for us a priority – no more overthinking the logistics, no more excuses. Don’t get me wrong – Target date nights are awesome and they’ll make do in a pinch, but it’s time to start setting the bar a little higher.